Should She Take The Initiative By Asking Him Out?

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What should be the norm? Should the man always have to ask the woman out all the time or can a woman seize the initiative and ask the man out. Should a woman propose marriage to a man? In holy matrimony are there laid out rules on who should start the rumble in the jungle when the lights are out?


A virtuous woman is worth more that precious rubies. She should be sought after, treasured and in actual fact pursued. Like a precious jewel she is priceless. In my opinion, the man should do the asking out and pursuing when dating and even in marriage. A woman that knows her worth would not advertise herself cheaply or display her goods for the masses. The man should work his socks out just like Jacob worked hard for Rebecca. Letting yourself go at his every beck and call sends the wrong signals and places a ‘SALE’ tag on you. An item on sale either has a defect, was returned by a customer, not sold over a long period of time or simply not good enough to sell. Is that the signal you want to transmit? As a woman of substance, virtue and faith you should have some grace about you, command respect and admiration, and your character should demand the attention of others. It is not about beauty and physical endowment, it’s all about character, attitude and composure.

But what happens when a woman likes a man but he doesn’t seem to realise it or seem interested? Should she make him interested, be blunt, take the bull the horn and pop the question? As the saying goes, patience is a virtue. I believe if he is the right man for you, you can settle in on your knees and not with your lips, hips of finger tips except you think there are things God cannot do.

Know and be who you are in Christ, be friendly and available but not desperate. You shouldn’t be chasing him about, always making the phone calls, sending text messages, selfies, suggesting dates, and buying him gift, perhaps when the relationship has developed to a certain level, the efforts to keep it alive should be mutual, but definitely not at the onset. I believe it’s a man thing to want to conquer, be it a task, duty or battle. If you offer yourself on a platter of gold without him making any effort, guess how he’ll treat you? You guessed right, Just Like rubbish. Deep inside he’ll think you are desperate and vulnerable.

However, there should be balance. Everything should be done in moderation. Don’t take it to the extreme by playing hard to get, you might just frustrate the man of your dreams. It’s not about pretence, it all about knowing who you are, how precious you are in the sight of God and acting like a King’s Kid and a joint heir with the Prince of Peace.

In holy matrimony, both parties should be intimate with each other, naked and unashamed. Neither should feel embarrassed to take the initiative or to make the first move. In most cases it gives an air of assurance to the other party that he or she if valued, loved and attractive, especially the man. It might just be the spice to bring out the taste in the broth. If you’re hot go for it!

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About Author

Pele began his education in Nigeria before moving to the UK for a masters degree and subsequently a PhD in computer science. The sharp contrast in life and morals in the UK motivated him to start his blog, a website dedicated to sharing candid and virtuous views to enable individuals and families maximize their potentials in life, relationships and finances.

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