A Tough but Necessary Question
Would you rather marry someone you know is not right for you and later face the pain of divorce, or make the difficult decision to walk away before the wedding day? It is not an easy choice, but it is one that deserves deep thought.
As painful as it may be to end an engagement, the emotional and spiritual weight of a divorce can be even heavier—especially when children are involved.
Why People Still Go Ahead
Sometimes, both individuals know the relationship is not working, but they continue with the wedding for reasons such as:
- Pressure from family and friends
- An unplanned pregnancy
- The desire for immigration status
- Fear of embarrassment after sending out invitations
- Worry about their age or biological clock
These reasons may feel overwhelming, but they should never outweigh the importance of peace of mind and alignment with God’s will.
You Still Have a Choice
Until both people say “I do”, you still have a choice.
Just like a guest can raise an objection during the ceremony, either partner can pause and seek clarity.
Marriage is sacred. It should be entered into with peace, not pressure. If you have doubts, it is perfectly okay to take more time. There is no rush—you will have plenty of time to grow together in marriage.
Do Not Ignore the Red Flags
<
Do not let:
- The number of years you have been together
- Fear of disappointing others
- Societal expectations or timelines
…stop you from making a wise and prayerful decision.
If you are not at peace, take it seriously. Doubt is often a signal to pause and reflect.
If You Have Done Things Right
If your courtship has been:
- Rooted in God’s word
- Marked by honesty and mutual respect
- Guided by wise counsel
…then you should feel confident as you approach marriage. No couple is perfectly compatible, but shared values and spiritual grounding are essential for building a lasting union.
When You Are Facing a Difficult Decision
If you are considering whether to call off the relationship:
- Seek counsel from trusted mentors, especially those in the household of faith
- Pray for wisdom and ask God to guide your steps
- Take courage—you are not alone, and God is with you
God Will Heal and Restore
If walking away becomes the right choice, remember:
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” — Psalm 34:18
God can:
- Heal every wound
- Restore what was lost
- Renew your hope
- Strengthen you for what lies ahead
Final Encouragement
There is no shame in choosing wisely, even if it is painful. Trust God. Lean on His word. He will give you strength for today and peace for the future.
There is grace for every step—and joy on the other side of obedience.
